Tahoe Trip

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We went on a great trip to Tahoe November 30-December 4, 2010.

Awareness

Today is Prematurity Awareness Day, part of Prematurity Awareness Month. This campaign has been set up by the March of Dimes to raise awareness of the serious issue of premature birth. http://www.marchofdimes.com/mission/prematurity.html  
In addition to raising awareness the March of Dimes also raises important funds for research through their Prematurity Research Initiative. http://www.marchofdimes.com/research/prematurityresearch.html

We are more aware than I ever thought we would be about what it is to have a premature infant. The process of letting go of your expectations of what you had previously defined in your mind for the experience of welcoming your baby into your family is a very complex one. Having to rely on a medical team, having to put all of your trust in a group of people you haven’t met to care for your baby is a huge step that you are forced to take not gradually, but immediately. There is no time to adjust, there is just the reality that you must accept, you must move quickly and you must be prepared to do what you need to do for your baby. As we moved through the process of having Sophie so early, knowing she would be in the NICU for so long, knowing that we didn’t have much control over the day to day, our only choice was to move to acceptance and do the best we could every day. Many people said to us, “you are so strong, we don’t know how you do it.” The truth is we didn’t feel particularly strong. We did it because we had to, we had no choice but to do it, so we did. It is amazing what you can handle when you have no other option.

During this month of prematurity awareness, I wanted to remind myself how fortunate we are. How fortunate we were to be in the right place at the right time and to have access to some of the best medical care available. My hope is that making people aware of and giving support to organizations like the March of Dimes will prevent more families from having to go through what we did, and if they do, the medical technology will only improve, improving the outcomes for their babies.

One of the other parents who was in the NICU at the same time we were shared a quote with me, that really speaks to this experience, "Dostoevsky said that instead of cursing our suffering, we should pray to be made worthy of it." This is not a path I think any of us would chose and it is not a path I would ever want anyone else to have to go down, but I do feel like I am changed for having gone down it. For me, it is important to be aware, to reflect on all that has happened and to appreciate all the blessings of the present. Dylan will be five this week. Sophie will be at the party. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Family

Dylan put this potato head family together and then put it on his shelf.  He described the family in the following way:

The first one plays soccer, the next one goes to work and the last one stays home with the baby.

Giants Parade!

Lynda very bravely took both kids to see the Giants victory parade in San Francisco today.  Dylan was thrilled and spent most of the time yelling "Go Giants" while sitting on Lynda's shoulders.

Teeth!

Dylan lost his first tooth on October 30th and then lost another one tonight.  The Tooth Fairy brought him 4 quarters for the first tooth and we expect the same for this one.  Dylan also wanted to leave a "treat" for the Tooth Fairy, with the first tooth it was carrots and with this one it was a glass of milk.

Dylan gets his first teeth 6.15.06

Dylan loses his first teeth 10.30.10 & 11.3.10

Pumpkin Carving

Nursery Follow-Up Clinic

Today went to her first appointment at the nursery follow-up clinic.  At this appointment she is seen by her pediatrician, a behavioral/developmental specialist pediatrician and a physical therapist.  The purpose of the clinic is to look at her development more closely and check to see if there are any areas that might need attention.  Sophie appears to be right on track for her adjusted age.  The physical therapist gave us some activities and exercises we could do to help with some of the stiffness typical in preemies.  Everyone was very enthusiastic about how well she is doing.

Sophie also got the first in a series of Synagis shots which are given to micropreemies to help prevent RSV, Respiratory Syncytial Virus.  RSV is a very common virus that leads to mild, cold-like symptoms in adults and older healthy children. It can be more serious in young babies, especially to those in certain high-risk groups, including preemies.  In these high risk groups, getting the virus can mean serious respiratory issues that can require hospitalization,  oxygen or being put back on a ventilator.  The virus can not be treated by antibiotics.  The Synagis shots are not a vaccine, but instead a dose of antibodies that would help fight the virus if she were to get it, keeping her from getting a serious case.  She will have to have these shots once a month for 6 months during the RSV season.  She also got a flu shot and will have to get one more shot in a month since this is the first time she has received a flu shot.  She disliked both shots equally.

Sophie weighed 15 lbs. 12 oz, was 25.5 inches long and her head circumference was 17.32 inches.  Her doctor was thrilled with her growth.

Growth Percentiles
Adjusted age (4 mo. 3 wks)
weight/59th percentile
height/55th percentile
head/92nd percentile

Actual Age (8 months)
weight/9th percentile
height/5th percentile
head/58th percentile

        

Disney on Ice

Today we took Dylan to Disney on Ice in San Jose.  Sophie stayed with Grandma and Papa, so we were able to have a special outing for the 3 of us.  We all had a terrific time.

Rice Cereal

Who is the boss?

Dylan (age 4) to me last night in response to me telling him to brush his teeth, “ Mom is the boss.”
Me to Dylan, “Well, I am also the boss, and if I ask you to brush your teeth, I need you to do it.”
Dylan to me, “We’ll see who is the boss when I am a teenager.”

Pumpkin Cousins

Dylan and Sophie met up with their cousins in Livermore for our annual family pumpkin patch tradition.  The kids all had a great time.

Soccer

Grandma Barbara game to watch Dylan's last soccer practice and game.

Pumpkins!

On Saturday we had a fun day at the pumpkin patch.  Saturday evening we got all the Halloween decorations up.  Dylan said, "Mommy, this is the spookiest day ever!"  I think this is going to be a great Halloween.

Gratitude

Today Sophie is 4 months adjusted age, meaning if she was born on her due date, she would be 4 months old today. Just over a year ago I found out I was pregnant and was calculating that due date, June 8. We were so excited, the date also is the wedding anniversary of my parents and Lynda’s grandparents, a lucky day, we thought. A baby with a warm weather birthday, we envisioned BBQs and park parties, baby bathing suits.

I remember seeing the date along with the physicians and nurses on duty on the whiteboard in the delivery room and thinking, “February 22? My baby’s birthday is going to be February 22 or 23? How is that possible? I didn’t plan for February!”

So we have this wonderful baby with dualing birthdays. There is the day she was born and the day she was supposed to be born. What is and what should have been. A Pisces instead of a Gemini. Interesting that while she is younger than she is, I feel so much older than I am. I wonder if preemie parents get a corrected age too, you age about a year for every week your baby is in that hospital. On the upside, I am sure in a few years she will be campaigning for multiple birthday parties.

What have I learned? Well, I have learned there isn’t much in life you can control. All you can control is how you respond to it. The common sense part of me always knew that was true, but the rest of me really wanted to believe I was in control most of the time. Now, I know better. I have also learned how truly amazing people can be, how they will “show up” for you in all the right ways just when you need them the most. I have learned I hate hospital imitation Jello and that I will likely never be any good at crocheting. I have learned that the Winter Olympics really shouldn’t be watched in their entirety. I have learned that there is no pain you can feel from getting an IV, a shot, a blood draw or a medical procedure that compares to the pain of watching these things done to your baby. I have learned that I need to appreciate my health, the health of my children and the health of the people I love every day. I have learned that life is really a miracle and I need to be present and grateful every moment. I need to give more hugs. I have learned how truly blessed I am.

Some numbers…

175 days my pregnancy (280 days would have been full term)

90 days time Sophie was in the ICN

37 weeks, 5 days Sophie’s adjusted age the day she came home

135 days Sophie has been home

7 months, 3 weeks Sophie’s actual age

52 degrees average temperature in San Mateo County for February

70 degrees average temperature in San Mateo County for June

3.2 inches average precipitation in San Mateo County for February

0.1 inches average precipitation in San Mateo County for June

10 average number of rainy days in San Mateo County in February

1 average number of rainy days in San Mateo County in June

Weekend Fun

Our Amazing Girl

These are video clips and pictures we took while Sophie was in the hospital,  February- May 2010.

Sophie 9.19.10

Basketball